Unfortunately, I have no practical advice I can give you.
I spent 5 years as a drunk because it was an easy cope. It actually made my life worse despite me feeling better at the time, and I'm still dealing with the consequences a decade later.
The one thing I can offer you is that you'll find some reason to keep going eventually. For me, it was IHM. She saved my fuckin life even if I couldn't see it at the time.
Also realized that I'm not a fan of blacking out and hearing about what I pissed/puked on or broke, so I drink a couple IPAs once or twice a year and laugh at the way it feels to move my fingers. Beyond that, I just stick with weed (or your average cocktail of vapable cannabinoids such as THC-O/HHC) mainly.
You'll find your way.
>>241
I need some kind of word that combines congratulations and condolences for this.
>>243
That's the spirit.